Nik from Toronto: “Did the LCBO, in an attempt to be responsible or something, discontinue all malt liquors (essentially, shit alcohol with a content above 6% or so)? Just curious. Realized that I haven’t had a 40 in a while, nor have I see one.”

I decided to call them up to see what they had to say. The confused lady I ended up reaching had no idea what malt liquor was and it quickly became apparent that she was merely searching for it on their own website.

Since I can do that myself, I let her go and did a quick check which got us the answer we wanted.

You can still get Pabst Olde English 800 (311357, 1180 mL, $5.80) and Red Bull (679860, 710 mL, $3.25) around Toronto. Colt 45 (679845, 710 mL, $3.25) however, is only available in the boonies but you can get the larger size (676189, 1183 mL, $5.35) at Queen’s Quay, Yonge & Dundas and a couple of other locations as well as in multiple locations in Scarborough and North York.

The lady I talked to at the LCBO couldn’t say why the number of stores carrying malt liquor had shifted but I would imagine supply and demand has a larger impact on its availability. Also, the LCBO has been trying to gussy up their image in the past couple of years and it hards to see it fitting in well with their new direction (at least until Colt 45 brings back Billy Dee Williams for nostalgic ad campaign).

The G20 has ruined many things for the citizens of Toronto (road closures, school closures, transit delays, the St. Lawrence Market, uprooted trees, loss of income, loss of patio space, removal of bike stands… new annoyances are added everyday) but it’s going a bit too far when the LCBO decides it has to close 7 of its stores from Friday to Saturday.

To be fair, many of the products that would be found at these locations can be found at others but that doesn’t make it right. I guess a trip up to Summerhill is in order… |Toronto Sun|

One thing the G20 can’t ruin is Ontario Craft Beer Week. Besides the numerous events happening all week long, be sure to check out the Session Craft Beer Festival at Sunnyside Pavilion on Saturday (June 26th). |Ontario Craft Brewers|

The ash from Eyjafjallajokull may have never made it this far but Icelandic beer is coming to Toronto! Skjálfti (168393, 500 mL, $3.95) is a hoppy marriage between a pale ale and a lager and both Josh Rubin of The Star and Greg Clow of Taste T.O. dig it. (If you have trouble using the LCBO  website, don’t forget to log on to drinkvine, the best way to scout out new beers and wines in the GTA.) |Toronto Star, Taste T.O.|

If you want proof why marketers should never, ever come up with a beer brand, look no further than Biker Beer a brew produced out of Nickel Brook that came about because a couple attended a rally on their wedding day. Since no self-respecting biker (or human being) will ever drink this product, I’m betting it will come to be regarded as one of the most inane vanity products  in the history of beer ever.

I bet they even have matching beach towels with their initials monogrammed on ‘em. |Toronto Sun|

Despite what this blog might be saying, you can tell the difference between different wines and the distance between good and bad wine can be pretty fucking far indeed. Just don’t be a pretentious twit. |You Are Not Smart|

Conflict Kitchen is performance art masquerading as a take-out joint. Taking a country that the United States currently has a beef with, it will serve a signature dish and with everyone happily sated, will offer potential dialog in the form of “events, performances and discussions”. Afghanistan is the first subject and we’ll I’ve never tried kubideh (anyone want to make a road trip to Kabul Farms?) I’m always in favor of exposing people to new street-food. |Kubideh Kitchen|

Everyone knows red-heads are where it’s at so y’all will undoubtedly go for the Scarlet Harlot, a cocktail that combines brandy, Red Dubonnet and cherries in a most-pleasing manner. |CHOW|

Making drinks is easy; coming up with a catchy name for ‘em can often be an exercise in futility. (Here’s an easy formula: Take equal parts funny, sleazy and literary and add a touch of cheese. Voila… the Penelope Cruiser!) |New York Times|

People have added everything they possibly could to cocktails so far; why not minerals? |The Atlantic|

Summer drinks are the best kind of drinks there are! Go fresh and you’ll never be wrong… We have a Raspberry Mojito, a Cucumber Gimlet and a Watermelon Margarita. |à la carte kitchen, Crumpets and Cakes, SLOSHED!|

If, like me, you’re going to stick with the same damned drink all year-round, it’s probably a Manhattan and you should make your own Maraschino (‘ski’ not ‘she’) cherries. |Cocktaliana|

Hell, go a bit further and go for the DIY Home Bar. Make brandied cherries, grenadine syrup, falernum, cocktail onions and orange bitters. It doesn’t get much better than that. |CHOW|

Get this book for the alcoholic curmudgeon in your life (and that would be me). |The Pegu Blog|

For those of us who like doing our drinking outside, it behooves us to plan accordingly. This cunning diagram demonstrates exactly how to best to pack a cooler and the secret ingredient is killer! |Valet|

While I may not dislike it as much as some folks, I was still quite pleased to receive an email from Curt Dunlop and Jed Corbeil, the duo behind the Griffin Gastropub and the Muskoka Beer Festival, informing me of their plans to hold a craft beer festival in Toronto.

The idea is incredibly exciting… local beers and food should attract a crowd of like-minded enthusiasts and the opportunity to sample some new brews (Tree Brewing from Kelowna, BC is sending their Hophead IPA!) is not to be missed. With 21 breweries attending at last count and each of them bringing 1 to 5 types of beer, it’s going to be a very busy day!

Corbeil and I made arrangements to meet at C’est What? which was appropriate considering the pub is basically a temple to local craft beer. It was quickly apparent that he’s the kind of guy who loves what he does. His passion for beer is definitely there and he knows his stuff but he’s no snob either. Noticing he was well into his pint of Black Oak’s 10 Bitter Years (my favorite of the moment) I ordered myself one as well and we got settled in to talk about Session, the Griffin Gastropub and Ontario Craft Brewers.

Corbeil was raised in Bracebridge (he calls it Molson territory) but eventually moved to Toronto where he studied music at the University of Toronto.  He later ended up in Japan where he found he really enjoyed their custom of going out with coworkers three or four nights a week to a succession of bars and restaurants. As he explains, “Everyone goes out because you can’t entertain at home; there’s no room.”

Things started to gel after a trip to Germany where his brother (now a brewer with Mill Street) introduced him to some excellent beers and a stint in Honduras where he learned how to run a small business. After coming back to Bracebridge with his wife to raise a family, Corbeil ended up buying a local pub with Curt Dunlop which became the Griffin Gastropub.

After switching from the macro-brews to Ontario craft beer they lost a chunk of their regulars but found they more than made up for it with new guests and some old-timers who came to appreciate the new brews. While deciding which beers to carry took a lot of thought, it was also a lot of fun.

“We consulted with my brother, Sam Corbeil, about some of the staples he liked in the Ontario craft market. We did a huge beer-shop at the LCBO at Queen’s Quay and spent the next couple of months drinking. It came down a lot to how readily available the beer was to the north as well as which breweries were ready to jump on-board with converting the locals. We had great help from some of the breweries, which are very much showcased at the bar, but we try our best to be as drinker-friendly as possible with our choice of styles. We like to have a wide variety of product but limit our styles to only a few brands… 2 or 3 blondes for example.”

With 10 taps and over 30 bottles, they were able to keep the beer nerds satisfied while offering comparable (and superior) brands to those might never have thought to have tried them before. Their selection even resulted in change at the local LCBO with the number of OCB products being offered jumped from 3 to 20.

Summing up his feelings about the advantage of craft beer, Corbeil says it’s all about “now versus whenever.” The idea of seasonal offerings ties into the growing emphasis on living both locally and seasonally and I don’t think that’s a bad thing for consumers to grow accustomed to.

Not content to simply run a pub, Corbeil and his partner began hosting beer dinners the last Sunday of every month featuring a different brewery or region every month. March was all about Quebec, April was the east coast and May went west. For all of June, they’re featuring Beau’s (one of my favorite breweries, you can find their Lugtread Lagered Ale [169334, 4x600 mL, $15.60] at most LCBOs ).

With the support they’d garnished so far, it only made sense to start a beer festival. Now in it’s second year, the Muskoka Beer Festival has proven to be a hit and they have approached the OCB about doing it seasonally around the province. ”Our goal is to have a festival for each season in a different city,” proclaims Corbeil.

With this kind of expansion come new challenges but he is up for it. “Greg Causeway [of the Toronto Festival of Beer] has been a great help with offering suggestions on what to do and what to avoid.” When asked to compare the two festivals, Corbeil had this to say:

“The TFOB to Session is like Microsoft to Apple. Microsoft is a very large company, very easily-accessible and user-friendly.  It has made a huge mark in its field and will continue to do so for years to come.

Apple is directed more to a specific target audience, with a more artistic approach in mind. Although it is also has the ability to be user-friendly, it also requires a great amount of time and dedication to master and truly enjoy what it has to offer.

I feel that Session will target those ready  to experience the creative significance of real craft beer. It will be a day for people to celebrate those craft brewers and the time and dedication they have put forth to get the attention of those who are willing to embrace it.”

Food is definitely going to play a big part. Duggan’s Brewery, the Leslieville Cheese Market and Rodney’s Oyster House amongst others will be serving up tapas-style plates that will undoubtedly pair with many of the brews served alongside. Corbeil promises there won’t be any “doubling-up” with types of food and that will come from the GTA.

When asked whether there are any new beers attendees should be particularly excited about he says people should look out for Muskoka’s cask-conditioned IPA, Tree’s Hophead and Great Lakes Miami Vice. When it comes to OCB beers in general, he really enjoys Black Oak’s 10 Bitter Years, Mill Street’s seasonals and Garrison’s Imperial IPA and Hop Yard Ale. “I think people are going to be blown away by some of Muskoka’s upcoming seasonals.”

With a winning combination of OCB beer and local food, it’s safe to say that Session will definitely please enthusiasts and maybe even convert some with more mainstream tastes. Corbeil, Dunlop, the OCB and the others who are helping put this together have definitely raised the bar and if they pull this off, I can only hope that others will follow their lead.

—

The festival is being held on June 26th, from 12 to 8pm. Admission will cost ya $35 and it’s being held at Sunnyside Pavilion which is located at 1755 Lakeshore Boulevard West, Toronto.

Whatever… It’s a good idea. Promoting wines grown and cellared in Ontario and protecting our greenbelt by making vineyards economically-viable productions sounds a whole lot better to me than adding to the coffers of the Canadian arm of a multinational corporation that buys wine in bulk overseas to blend with its local product.

The big boys do have a point though. Without a concerted effort to educate consumers on why they should be taking a second look at VQA, they may very well heed the call of the bottom line and buy foreign wine.

Also, this change needs to extend to the LCBO. Give VQA even more shelf space and extend the selection to include vineyards who were excluded before because of their smaller production runs. Only so many people will pay attention to ad campaigns; making a change at the end of the line could have a far greater impact.

(If you want a real laugh, read some of the comments left by readers of the article, howling with outrage over another tax… These people are truly and utterly without a clue.) |The Globe And Mail|

While I’m not a big fan of the trend towards noisy restaurants with minimal padding, the science behind why this makes people drink more certainly rings true. Apparently, people eat and drink faster when sonically assaulted because they want to get the hell out of there which results in bigger profits for the owner.

Maybe I’m just old-fashioned but doesn’t this seem like a bad idea? How does this create a pleasurable dining experience? I fucking hate the music at Jack Astor’s; if you’re right under a speaker it’s nearly impossible to converse with the person next to you. I’ll take an old-school bistro with small two-tops any day. |The Daily Beast|

It gives me quite a bit of pleasure to share a cocktail that not only comes from my family’s country but employs a whole lot of their bitters: The Queen’s Park Swizzle. |Rum Dood|

Another classic drink that doesn’t get the attention it deserves is the Blood and Sand. Like Paystyle says, bump up the Scotch and OJ to achieve nirvana. |Happy Hour|

If you love gin as much as I do, you’re gonna love this collection of gin cocktail recipes, freshly-conceived at a recent Thursday Drink Night. |The Mixosoleum|

I’ve broken my fair share of glassware while washing it so sponges that are shaped to clean ‘em perfectly seems like a good idea to me. |The Spoon Sisters|

Ready to move beyond buying your beer in bottles/cans but not into the idea of brewing your own (it’s not that hard but whatever)? Build a kegerator! |Kegerators.com|

Down in New Orleans, this museum turns into a bar at night. They even tie in the cocktails with the exhibits! This is much better (and a hell of a lot more egalitarian) than the AGO’s members-only wine-tastings.|NOLA.com|

Those of us who don’t have access to flying “Upper Class” on Virgin Atlantic have to make do with what we have around us when it comes to drinking on flights. |Jaunted|

And last but not least, impress your friends and pay off hefty bar tabs with this neat trick of opening a beer bottle with a bill. |Wonder How To|

One of my favorite mixes (for an 8oz flask mind you, go for 16oz and be the life of the party!) starts with 6oz of bourbon. Add 1oz of Frangelico, 1oz of Cointreau and a 3 heavy dashes of Angostura bitters and you’re good to go. |NOLA|

Bored with bourbon? Substitute your spirits and be delighted with the infinite variables now open to you! |SF Gate|

A good example of this would be the “Rum Manhattan“. |Eat.Drink.Think|

For those of you who like a little protein with your cocktail, try one of these ten fat-washed cocktails. I’m totally down with the Irish Bacon Sour but maple syrup makes everything better. |Time|

Fruit will always be popular and when combined with gin, you really can’t go wrong with a cocktail like The Bramble. Remember, anything vodka can do, gin can do better. |Science of Drink|

Don’t believe me? Try the Orange Blossom (a far superior Screwdriver). |SLOSHED!|

Moonshine’s not just for country-folk anymore; the nerds have taken over! |The Atlantic||McClatchy|

I love mezcal even more than tequila. It’s smoky deliciousness and I’m digging how it’s starting to get its due. It’ll be the next big thing after rum, mark my words. |The New York Times|

If you were a student (or poor or both) in the first part of the twenty-first century, you probably bought a case of Lakeport at least once or twice. Labatt is closing the Lakeport Brewery in Hamilton and moving its production south-west to London to save money.

They’re not releasing any figures but I’m betting consumers faced with better, equally-cheap options have moved on. |The Globe And Mail|

While Ontarians are losing their jobs, Danish workers are striking because Carlsberg has decided to limit the consumption of beer to lunchtime. Drivers in particular are upset, pointing to a “very old right” to get buzzed on up to three beers per day. |Sky News|

Researchers at Harvard University are saying that a person’s social network may influence their drinking, with folks being “50 percent more likely to drink heavily if a person they are directly connected to drinks heavily and 36 percent more likely to drink heavily if a friend of a friend drinks heavily”.

This is pretty worrying, especially when you factor in that people are 28 percent more likely to jump off a cliff in the presence of their peers. |Sifiy News|

Socially-responsible branding only seems to happen in Canada (and maybe Scandinavia). Over in the EU, two Germans  have received permission to sell their beer which goes by the name of “Fucking Hell”, the former being the name of a small town in Austria and the latter the German term for a pale lager.

The loophole seems to be the absence of a reference to a particular person, group, act or instruction which rules out the half-dozen brands my friends and I came up with one drunken night (everything from “Tranny Surprise” to “Uncle Joe’s Pogrom Ale”) |New Zealand Herald|

While we might have the Toronto Temperance Society, cities down south have been playing this game for awhile: Washington DC has the Columbia Room which, while not having a membership, charges $65 per person for a boozy prix fixe. |The Washington Post|

For those who want the appearance of a speakeasy without the exclusivity, the little town of Bethlehem (Pennsylvania) has The Bookstore, an homage to all things turn-of-the-century. |Lehigh Valley Live|

Or there’s always the top ten most unusual bars in the world. Cover all of your bases. |Travel Vivi|

Beer Goggler: The perfect app for anyone experiencing one night stand regret. |App Shopper|

Or you could just have standards (but you probably wouldn’t have as many good stories). Another useful accessory for saving your seat and/or drink is the Seat Saver, a clever amalgamation of coaster and marker. |Beer Mats Rule!|

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(Photo taken from Anne Taintor’s website. Go buy a flask from her.)

Too bad that with Hogs Back Traditional English Ale (157560, 500 mL, $3.75)  my excitement didn’t last much longer beyond the pour (which was quite lovely with a dark, amber colour and a fair bit of sediment). Maybe I’ve been ruined in super-hopped beers but I was fairly underwhelmed by the light body and mild flavor. There was some malt and caramel in there and a very slight, bitter finish but that was about it and the aroma was similarly-disappointing.

Honestly, it felt a little stale to me (the quickly-dissipating head worried me a bit too) and I couldn’t help wondering if this would’ve been a whole lot tastier pumped fresh.

I’d like to try another bottle or, better yet, get in on a cask but for now, I’ll stick with Fuller’s E.S.B. (106435, 500mL, $2.45).

How I came by the couple bottles of Rickard’s Dark currently sitting in my fridge is another matter altogether.  I’d missed a tasting at O. Noir, a new restaurant where you are served food in darkness by blind servers, and the P.R. company associated with the event had sent me some samples.

In the back-and-forth battle between Molson Coors and Anheuser-Busch InBev to branch out through their subsidiaries, Rickard’s and Alexander Keith’s respectively, I’d been a practically non-existent spectator. While I’d hesitate to call either the Red of the faux-I.P.A undrinkable, they’re both unremarkable, especially when there are so many other delicious beers out there.

Rickard’s had definitely edged out Keith’s (why the hell does Keith’s White taste like Corona?) when it came to wheat beers but that’s like praising one of the slow kids because the gifted child happens to be out of the room (which in this particular instance is Weinhenstephaner Hefe Weissbier [75291, 500mL, $.3.05]).

Honestly, I generally prefer Rickard’s to Keith’s and it’s not just because one of the latter’s spokesmen turned out to have a thing for kids. I also think their beers are better, if only marginally so.

Seeing as I’d been out biking all day and worked up a powerful thirst, I decided to crack one open and see what this new, dark beer was all about. Described as being “brewed in the style of English porters” I was hoping for something with a nice body that I could order at a Firkin, for example, in place of a macro-lager.

It poured a dark amber (much like the T.E.A. actually) and retained at least half of the head a couple of minutes after pouring with some minimal lacing. The aroma was a bit trickier in that I had quite a bit of trouble detecting much of it at all beyond a hint of roasted malt and maybe some caramel.

A couple mouthfuls in, I was struck by how it managed to be both sweet and fairly watery; definitely lighter than I was expecting. Flavour-wise, it was a stronger take on on the aroma with a hint of maple syrup in the astringent finish.

This is definitely not a porter; it was more of a dark ale in the broadest sense of the handle.

While not as good as their White, it was definitely not going to compete against some of the porters from the States and England that I’ve had the pleasure of drinking. I’ve never gotten around to trying Keith’s Dark (incorrectly introduced to the market as a Stag’s Head Stout) but I would imagine Rickard’s take is probably the better one.

Do I hate this beer? No but I’m not particularly impressed either. You could do far worse at many bars but in this day where there’s usually at least one decent beer to pick at any given venue, I can’t see many people making this their go-to dark beer.

Everyone I’ve talked to who has tried it feels pretty much the same. I’m guessing Molson could style it as an introduction to dark beers but likening a product to training wheels for better beers is hardly the best way to carve out a meaningful share of the market.

—

(Photo taken from Matthew Black’s Flickr Photostream.)

Flor de Cana 7 Year Old (26286, 750 mL, $30.20)

El Dorado 5 Year Old (894014, 750 mL, $24.80)

El Dorado 15 Year Old (705418, 750 mL, $59.75)

Havana Club Barrel Proof (113159, 700 mL, $55.20)

Havana Club Anejo Reserva (443903, 750 mL, $26.95)

Sailor Jerry Spiced (80127, 750 mL, $28.45)

Wray & Nephew Overproof (326223, 750 mL, $34.95)

Matusalem 15 Year Old Gran Reserva (464222, 750 mL, $39.95)

Pyrat XO (a bit of a cheat ‘cos it’s not available anymore)

Appleton V/X (177808, 750 mL, $23.75)

There are some new rums out there that I have yet to try; Element 8 Gold Rum (135517, 700 mL, $ 59.95), Brugal Gold Label Rum (600502, 750mL, $22.95), Papagayo Fairtrade Organic Golden Rum (118612, 700mL, $26.35) and Sea Wynde Pot Still Rum (162537, 750mL, $49.95).

Of course, with the here-today-gone-tomorrow attitude the LCBO has when it comes to keeping products on their shelves, I’ll probably not get a chance. Anyone tried ‘em yet? |Kaiser Penguin|

For every recipe there can be as many as half-a-dozen alternatives. While we can debate the “trueness” of each one, it makes much more sense to focus on enjoying what works the individual. I like my gin-and-tonics with a healthy dose of Angostura Bitters (an adulterated Pink Gin if you will); it works for me.

As a bartender, I’m sometimes guilty of getting snarky with guests who assign the wrong name or attributes to a cocktail they’ve ordered. It can be difficult to separate ego from adequately satisfying the needs of a guest but I find the best way to sidestep this issue is to ask a series of leading questions in order to establish exactly what it is they want.

You can always make fun of their shitty taste when they’re gone. |Underhill-Lounge|

If you happen to be in Phoenix, check out some of these bars. Last time I was there, I wasn’t even legal. |AZCentral|

On the other hand, if you’re in the Liaoning Province in China and someone offers you a bottle of moonshine, don’t accept… it could have been made from tiger bones! |UPI|

The National Restaurant Association is looking for “signature cocktails” and if they pick yours you’ll get cash and be featured in all sorts of promotions. Judging from the picture on the website, it won’t be much of a contest if they’re using Bacardi flavored-rums. |National Restaurant Association|

For those of us looking for good drinking, look no further than these Kentucky Mimosas. Bourbon and sage? I’m down! |The Bitten Word|

Next time you’re at a halfway-decent bar, try asking for the Bee’s Knees. You won’t be disappointed. |Science of Drink|

Or you could always just get a Zombie. Like most tiki drinks, fresh ingredients will make or break this cocktail so don’t just order one anywhere. Most places that couldn’t make one properly also probably wouldn’t serve more than 3OZ of booze in one sitting so you’re not missing out. |Sippity Sup|

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(Photo found randomly through Google Image search. Yes, this means I’m not going to credit it.)

Only thing is, you have to pay an annual membership fee of $285 for the privilege of hanging out with like-minded imbibers.  Perfection doesn’t come cheap…

In another instance of exclusivity = credibility, a travelling cocktail party in Los Angeles is the Next Big Thing. Only a matter of time before someone starts doing that here (hey, wait-a-minute).

Apparently, shit beer equals poor stock performance for major beer companies. Who’d have thought? Even better, the supposed panacea for these corporations involves buying up perfectly good craft breweries and wringing every little bit of individuality from their recipes.

Robert Parker, the venerable wine critic, rated a wine higher in a blind tasting than he had in his published review of it earler. Cue snickering

Alcademics reviews a new liqueur from Bolivia that is made from coca leaves. While not quite monkey-for-your-back, it apparently does give you a boost. They also take a look at a mezcal, my new favorite tipple.

I’ll drink a bicicletta if it means I get to have a two-hour lunch in the afternoon to boot! Half-an-hour is practically criminal.

Moonshine goes mainstream with white whiskey. Hopefully the LCBO will get notice and start selling a bottle here (I’m not holding my breath).

Another thing they should get on Right Away is St. Germain. Why is this not available in Canada? It practically sells itself! Here are some cocktails to tide you over…

Over at A Mountain Of Crushed Ice, Tiare talks about collecting bar tools (which is about as wonderfully geeky as you can get when it comes to the industry).

Dr. Bamboo resucitates Midori melon liqueur (at least for enthusiasts) with a cocktail that actually sounds pretty tasty. I predict a dark age revival… Can new uses for blue curacao be far behind?

I grit my teeth every time someone asks for a Keiths. A Good Beer Blog pointed me in the direction of guys who just might be my heroes. I wouldn’t mind so much if people just admitted to being biased towards mainstream brands.

If I had a little more discipline, I’d release my own brand of syrups and bitters instead of waiting for lines like Trader Tiki to make their way up to Canada.

SLOSHED! puts together a Bumble-bee Cocktail which sounds amazing, courtesy of Charles H. Baker Jr. and his book, Gentlemen’s Companion (not a new release in case you were wondering). They’ve also managed to introduce me to my new favorite quote (by the same man)

…all really interesting people–sportsman, explorers, musicians, scientists, vagabonds and writers–were vitally interested in good things to eat and drink; cared for exotic and intriguing ways of composing them. We soon discovered further that this keen interest was not solely through gluttony, the spur of hunger or merely to sustain life, but in a spirit of high adventure.

What an excellent sentiment!

—

(Image taken from Boing-Boing)

With that in mind, I thought I’d find out whens and wheres of buying booze in TO for the next week and share it with y’all.

LCBO

No stores will be open on Boxing Day but Dec. 27th will see most stores open from noon till 5pm. Monday to Thursday will also see regular hours of operation but on Thursday, New Years Eve, all stores will close at 6pm. You’re best off hitting up your local store and avoiding the downtown core.

The Beer Store

They’re closed Boxing Day but all stores that normally open on Sundays will do so on Dec. 27th. Just be sure to get there before 5pm. Monday to Wednesday will also see regular hours of operation in effect but they will close on New Year’s Eve at 6pm so don’t leave the party-stocking till the last minute. Better yet, don’t shop at The Beer Store.

Mill St.

There were no holiday hours specified but the retail store is usually open from 11am till 9pm on Saturday. Sunday to Tuesday, it’s 11am till 6pm. Wednesday and Thursday, it’s open from 11am till 8pm. I’d phone ahead.

Steam Whistle

It’s business as usual except on Christmas Day and New Years Day. Boxing Day, they’ll be open from 11am till 6pm.  Sunday (the 27th) they close at 5pm and from Monday to Thursday (New Years Eve), they’re open from noon till 6pm.

Amsterdam

Their website says holiday hours are 11am till 9pm  so I’m going to assume they’ll be open Boxing Day, at least until 6pm. Monday through Thursday sees them at normal hours of operation which is 11am till 11pm. Call ahead just to be safe.

Wine Rack

Gotta love a store that stays open till 11pm! Despite the lack of decent selection beggars can’t be choosers and I’vewritten about some decent options before so if you’re stuck, hit one up and make do. They should be open from Boxing Day till New Year’s Eve and most of the downtown locations are open till 10pm or 11pm. Check before you head out though.

Vineyards Estate Wines

While there are no holiday hours posted anywhere, it’s a safe bet that if the Loblaws, Metro or Sobey’s they’re in is open, they will be too. They’re generally closed by 6pm.

I was quite surprised to read in The Globe and Mail that the Liberal government has hired two banks to look into selling the LCBO and other Crown assets to cover this year’s deficit.

After all, wasn’t this brought up before by Mike Harris et al. (and Ernie Eves before him?) and dismissed when the government realized that selling valuable assets to raise money may help cover their deficit now won’t do much for balancing the budget the next year?

But leaving aside whether it’s smart for the Liberals to divest themselves of one of their best and brightest cash cows, which is best for the citizens of Ontario; sale or no sale?

Judging from the comments on the G&M article, a lot of people are confused as to whether this would be a good thing and while I’m not an unabashed fan of the LCBO, I’m also not about to jump on the privatization bandwagon unless I’m sure that it would really benefit us.

So let’s look at the three of the biggest points being raised and see whether they have any merit or not.

Booze would be cheaper.

Really? That would be nice but most consumers don’t realize is that there In the US, each state has its own laws concerning the distribution and sale of alcohol. Some places are cheaper than others but I still have fond memories of brown-bagging tall-boys in NYC; I went to quite a few variety stores and prices ranged from $1.25 to$2.50 for a Coors Light which is not that radically different but you obviously pay more for the “convenience”. A case of mass-market, domestic beer that costs $36 in Ontario typically costs $22 in Quebec and about $18 in New Jersey.

The reason it’s generally cheaper down in the States has everything to do with taxes. Here in Canada, we pay a 26.5% tax on alcohol which includes a 5.75% liquor mark-up fee. In the US, the percentage of taxes applied to alcohol varies from state to state but they’re nowhere near as high.

I’d be the last person to suggest we get rid of the taxes that pay for our health care system (amongst other things) but I do think the mark-up is ridiculous. Still even if the LCBO were sold and the mark-up was removed, we wouldn’t be looking at the same price levels they have in the States; we would probably be a lot closer to Alberta or Quebec. (Strangely enough, spirits are cheaper in Alberta but wine and beer aren’t. Wine and beer are cheaper in Quebec thanks to provincial subsidies that favor local products.)

And there’s no guarantee the mark-up would disappear. If anything, it’s unlikely it would go anywhere since pricing is regulated by the government to ensure socially-responsible consumption of alcohol which, along with store hours, is one of the primary methods they employ to prevent us from degenerating into a bunch of booze-soaked rummies (so we’re told).

Worse yet, if the entire company was sold and allowed to continue as a monopoly except in private hands, we’d have yet another Beer Store on our hands and you only have to look at Hydro One and the telecom companies to see where that gets the consumer.

Looking at the graph above (snatched from the LCBO website) it’s clear that the LCBO controls too much of market to allow it operate as a second private monopoly, answerable to no one but its stockholders.

The selection would be greater.

Yes and no. While the opportunity for specialists to open shops catering to niche markets is greater, there’d be just as many people carrying the same mass-market swill we see everywhere. With the exception of the bigger stores, most LCBOs only stock what they know consumers in their area will be likely to buy. Most private operations wouldn’t be any different.

One big concern is that while the bigger cities in Ontario would probably have no worse selection than they do now, many smaller towns in outlying areas would see their stores close with no guarantee of any replacement.

The sale of alcohol needs to be controlled.

Deciding who buys booze and when they can buy it is an age-old concern. Some people say there’s no harm in having convenience stores sell beer and wine while others argue that public drunkenness and under-age drinking will become bigger problems.

I’ve always argued that kids should be exposed to alcohol sooner rather than later (presumably limiting all of that surreptitious, binge drinking) but as that’s generally an unpopular opinion to have, I’d also like to point out that those same stores seem to do a pretty good job of preventing kids from smoking too.

Fact is, people will do what they want to do and the best results have always come from education and integration, not prohibition. The laws we already have in place will take care of the egregious offenders; why persecute anyone else?

Despite my beefs with the LCBO, I’ve come to realize that the provincial government is responsible for nearly all of ‘em… the insane mark-up, lack of inter-provincial distribution (where the hell are my Quebec beers and my BC wines?) and inconvenient store hours.

Selling the LCBO doesn’t change any of that.

The powers that be will still regulate the fuck out of whomever’s selling us our booze and unless they decide private operators to cater to niche consumers, we’ll be looking at another monopoly. We don’t need another Beer Store.

What we do need is a reexamination of the liquor laws and regulations that have their background in Ontario’s Scottish-Protestant roots and adjusting them to fit a society that, over the past decade, has become a lot more conscious of when and how they drink, what they want to buy and where they buy it from.

(And a little store downtown selling me limited-release tequila, absinthe and bitters would be nice too.)